i love the way you love, but i hate the way i'm supposed to love you back.

why are we as humans such selfish creatures by nature? why do we always want what we can’t have or don’t need? and why do we take advantage of other people and take each other for granted?

because as an intelligent friend so eloquently implied, humans are inherently evil. we are evil & selfish by nature when we are influenced by the wicked world.

see, i’ve always been what people call a ‘dreamer’. i’ve always believed in the inherent ‘good’ in people and believed in fairytales and romance and blah blah blah. and i guess that starry-eyed girl is still in there somewhere…she’s just become a bit jaded lately due to some ‘unfortunate events’. i would like to believe that there is still some good left in people, and that it’s possible for people to appreciate each other and love each other and get along with each other, etc. (i would also like to believe that the frog who lives outside my front door would magically turn into dave gimenez one day and lay a big fat kiss on me and ask me to run away with him where we would live happily ever after somewhere on the tooth & nail touring circuit…getting married somewhere along the way and acquiring several children…) but i digress…

we use people for our own benefit until we use them up and then we move on. that’s not the way God intended for us to live. we are here to love each other and be living examples of Him and His love. if everyone would give to others instead of only taking, then no one would feel ‘used up’ because everyone would be constantly replenished. but, ‘the world’ tells us that we should only be concerned with ourselves and let others fend for themselves. and we listen…even as Christians. i have heard the phrase ‘you better believe i’m gonna get mine’ or some variation of it so many times that it seriously makes me physically ill. i mean….whatthacrap?

we take and we take and we take. and what ends up happening is, the people that actually do care and love and give end up getting hurt, used, abused, and thrown away. and eventually…those people will cease to exist.

i think it’s time that we all re-examine our lives (myself included) and stop taking advantage of others and taking people for granted. we should pray that God will teach us how to be givers instead of just takers. and that we will learn to be thankful for everyone that is special in our lives…whether they be family, friends, church family, co-workers, schoolmates, teammates, band mates, complete strangers, or whatever. take the time to appreciate what you have instead of focusing on what you don’t. and learn how to show your appreciation in ways that will be appreciated right back!

and yes…i’m talking to myself here.